Q. Recently, my husband and I dropped our youngest child at college several hundred miles away. I have felt so depressed since then. We were actively involved in our son’s sports teams and with his friends for the past five years. My husband seems OK, but I feel lost. Please offer some tips for surviving the next few months.
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Q. My husband has an anger management problem but he refuses to admit it. Recently, he beat up our oldest son and threatened our teenage daughter. They want little to do with him now. I just keep my mouth shut, but I can’t see going on like this forever. If I mention that he needs help, he becomes belligerent. What makes him this way? I have enough money to leave, but I’m frightened to do so.
Q. A close family member recently died, and I’m devastated. She was so young, and I keep thinking about it. However, I have yet to cry. People have been critical that I’m able to function, and that only seems to make me feel worse. Please give me some advice on coping with grief.
Q. I am a 35-year-old man, not a doctor but working in emergency rooms for 20 years. From the things I have seen and dealt with in the emergency room, I think I have PTSD. I am still working but every day gets harder, and I don’t want to go to work. I have heard that disability benefits are available for PTSD, and I am wondering if it might be possible for me to receive them.
Q. I think my wife could be having an affair. She gets calls at night from one of her male co-workers; she is working late more often; and she has made positive changes in her appearance. Our children are grown, I recently retired, and I wanted this to be our time together. I don’t want to accuse her of cheating; I just want to make our marriage better. Give me some suggestions.
Q. I can’t get my 13 year-old daughter to talk to me. She wears her headphones when we are in the car, and when I ask her a question, I get a one word answer. I’ve tried to talk to her, but she seems really annoyed everytime I approach her. My son was not like this. What can I do to encourage communication? I feel really lost.
Q. I’m a 32-year-old woman with a child, a husband and a full-time job. I feel stressed out all of the time. My mother keeps telling me she did the same thing while raising four children. Is my generation really under that much more pressure than previous ones? My mother thinks I’m just a wimp.
Q. After the July 4th weekend, I’m certain that my husband has an alcohol problem. He was drinking all weekend and made the holiday miserable for my family. He says he’s a social drinker, but I know his brother and father are both alcoholics. He hates his job and says that is the reason he drinks. How can I convince him that he needs help?
Q. I am in my 50s. The woman I am dating does not want to meet my friends. When she does she is very uncomfortable and seems to always say the wrong thing. Then she apologizes for hours. She says she has social anxiety. What are the symptoms? Please tell me it can be cured. It is ruining our relationship.
Q. My job is increasingly stressful. It seems the work load has doubled. I love my job, and I don’t want to quit, but I’m irritable and tired all of the time. My doctor tells me that I’m running a health risk at my age (early 60s) by staying in the job because my blood pressure has increased and I’ve gained about 20 pounds in the last year. Is there anything I can do to resolve the problem before I have to quit?
Q. My husband had surgery and was in intensive care for several days. He is in his early 70s, so he’s not very old. While he was there, he often didn’t seem to know who I was or what was going on. Since he returned home, he has become very depressed. Are these conditions normal? He can’t return to his routine for a few months at least. I am very worried about him even though his doctors say his depression should go away.
Q. My best friend is in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship. No one would believe that this is happening since her husband is well-respected in the community. I’m afraid that he is mentally unbalanced and will really harm her. How can I intervene since I think she’s in real danger?
Q. I can’t seem to work my way out of poverty. I just had my second child, and I’ve heard that childhood poverty can have an impact on a child’s functioning in adulthood. I want to do everything possible to be certain that my daughter has a brighter future than I have. I don’t think I’ve done a great job with my son, and I want to do better with her. What impact could our poverty have on her future?
Q. I have had panic attacks for a few years. They were diagnosed by my doctor, but, I didn’t want to take medication. The panic episodes come and go, but recently they have been overwhelming. I get dizzy, have a fast heartbeat, and fear I’m going to pass out. Why do I keep having them and what can I do to control them?
Q. I am a first-year college student who made C’s and D’s this semester. I know that I am depressed, but my parents tell me that I’m just lazy. They are against all medications for mental health problems and refuse to discuss it with me. They have told me I can use St. John’s wort because it is natural. What can I do to convince them that I need “real” medication?
Q. I have been depressed and anxious since my daughter and her husband began to have problems a few years ago. I’m seeing a therapist, but she suggested that I talk to my doctor about medication. I have an appointment with my doctor, but I get really nervous, and forget to ask questions. Can you provide a list of questions for me to take to the doctor with me?
Q. My 23-year-old daughter is pregnant. Her husband is a heavy drinker and smoker.
Q. Everyone is talking about mindfulness as a way to relieve stress and anxiety. What is it? I need something that will help my workplace stress.
Q. I think I’m depressed; I still go to work and go out with friends, but I don’t enjoy my life anymore. The depression started after my divorce five years ago. I’ve never been to therapy. It scares me a bit to think about it, but I know I need help.
Q. I was anorexic in my teen years. Now I’m in my late 40’s and it has come back. People tell me how good I look, and even praise me on how little I’m eating. Please warn your readers about the dangers of anorexia.
Q. I think my husband has PTSD, but he refuses to acknowledge it. He was in Iraq, and he’s experienced some stressful events on his job since returning home. He gets angry each time I mention his problems. Please explain more about PTSD since he reads your column.
Q. I’m a single woman taking care of my 92-year-old mother who has dementia. Although I have some help, much of the responsibility is mine. My job is suffering, and I feel like I’m losing my mind. Some of her friends have even been critical of me. Please give me some suggestions.
Q. My teenage son smokes pot fairly often. I understand that it can be more harmful to adolescents than adults. Could you write something about the dangers that marijuana poses for teens?
Q. Recently a friend of mine, who was only 18, committed suicide. I knew he was upset, and I feel guilty that I didn’t take him seriously enough. Please address the issue of what to do if we suspect a friend is suicidal.
Q. I married a man several months ago. We are both well-adjusted, happy people in our early 70s. The problem is that his three daughters seem resentful of me. He was a widower, so I did not break up his marriage. Is this typical behavior for adult children? What can we do to resolve the conflict?
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